this post was submitted on 10 Nov 2023
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Sometimes I wonder if I should try to take up music casually. Neuroplasticity for depressed brains and all that. But honestly I don’t know if I’d be able to stick with it even if I wanted to. Creativity is presented as something that flows but it still takes energy and grit to learn a new skill. Discipline for consistency. The confidence to persevere. Everything people having a really hard time lack. Everything people with my (potentially undiagnosed ADHD) type of brain lack.
Also while I don’t mind a tiny cheap shitty quiet thing that’s barely an instrument (given my commitment level, budget, space and noise constraints it would be) I absolutely hate the songs you’re supposed to learn on. For every instrument really. Nottt my taste at all.
I was “talented” as a kid (whatever tf that means - I genuinely don’t believe I was, I think that was the wishful thinking of the adults around me) but quite lazy. Didn’t want to practice, didn’t care about learning to read sheet music. I would memorise tunes or figure them out by ear. Then I had some extremely demotivating and pressuring experiences with it and never picked anything up again.
I think there's too much pressure these days with the idea that if you take up a musical instrument or artform you have to be "good at it" or it's completely not worth it and it's a waste of time. It's like you're not allowed to play/paint/sculpt (or whatever) purely for the pleasure of it. For fun! I read something recently to the effect that if you had a good time and enjoyed something, then the time isn't wasted (makes me feel better about my 20s 😉) I say if you want to enjoy something then do it. And if you try and don't enjoy it then good, you learnt something. If you're not technically perfect or proficient or prodigious or whatever, then stiff cheddar! Don't be your own harshest critic and rob yourself of fun. We need to take back the idea of doing things for the fun of it without being perfect at it.
The pressure is putting me off anything I want to do, and the worst part is it's self imposed
It’s more motivating when you find a piece of music that you want to play… bern getting back into piano and trying to remember how to read sheet music again.
I was going through all the grades / exams as a kid and was doing performances for vce. I didn’t touch my piano for a long time after that.
I would have to get really creative tbh. I've found maybe a few but don't know how easy it would be