Neurodivergence

I think a lot of the advice here is good, but if you feel you are being set off by every little thing, you may have something else that bothers you. I've got both ADHD and high levels of anxiety and definitely have times where I have extreme emotional sensitivity to things, especially where it feels like someone is challenging me or where I think they are making unreasonable demands.

It's taken a lot of work on my part to recognize that when those feelings are heightened I need to explore what are the stressors in my life and maybe what ever I'm snapping about is unrelated to what is setting me on edge. Sometimes its because I need to have a difficult conversation with one and I'm redirecting my feelings to more manageable places. Other times its huge amounts of stress and I need to take time to destress. And sometimes I just need to take a break or vacation or just find some me time to get away from people.

Finding your coping mechanisms works, but the first step, as cliche as it is, is recognizing there is a problem. I used to snap at people a lot, especially for random BS. A combination of growing older (where your emotions stop hitting you as hard as they do in your teens and early twenties) and growing more awareness of myself and how I react to stimuli helps me deal with my emotions in more healthy ways.

The long story longer is that you can absolutely deal with an anger issue, you just have to put the work into yourself to find the sources of those anger, be they actually tooling issues and learning how to pick those battles, or some other aspect of your life that is pushing on you that needs attention.