this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2024
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Make it clear that your supervisor is trapped in your conversation, not the other way around. When you have to be professional, be professional. But the rest of the time, talk about the dirt between the planks of wood at home. Talk about the sedimentation process of your aquarium's gravel. Basically the moste innate and boring topics that no normal human would bring up, repeated ad nauseam.
Make sure to take long pauses just to resume talking. Remember to take your time while monopolizing the conversation trying to find a word your forgot about.
Remember to mispronounce every word, especially if he corrects you but be sure to keep plausible deniability just in case he accuses you of doing it on purpose.
Remember to always blame everything on something that has no connection to it.
Remember to enrich your diet with garlic, to use terrible flavored candy or just skipping a meal for extra word flavor, if you can take the reputation hit.
Remember the magical phrase: "that reminds me of" and all variants of it.
Remember to look into his eyes, and to alternate between them and another part of his face as if something is wrong with it. Keep affirming that everything is alright while staring at that part.
Change the subject. All the time.
Have terribly strong inconsequential opinions and remind about them all the time.
Monopolize the conversation, but make him want to cut you off or talk. I
IMPORTANT : If the other party is silent, state how comfortable you are with this silent friendship.
I don't know if it's some neurodivergence or if other introverts feel the same way, but that is something I personally find very difficult and uncomfortable and I can't hold eye contact for more than a second or two at a time. What feels natural to me is to look at a person's mouth when they talk.
Would it help if i told you that you are staring at meat?
Sure hes a man, or woman, but first and foremost meat.
Sometimes this meat yells, sometimes this meat looks at you.
But lets all keep in mind, ladies and gentlemen, that any interlocutor be it beast or man is just meat.
You probably cooked meat also, just saying.
So take your time admiring the meat, stare in what it thinks it's soul is in, his personal comfort be damned!
Just dont take this advice as an excuse to dehumanise this person of course, as I heard some meats hold a scary skeleton within. But hey, you cant see that most of the time, its meatgavanza for now!
Not sure what that's supposed to help with. I'd be even more uncomfortable if my steak had eyes and made eye contact than when a person does it.