Definitely try again. I had a stupid doctor as well and it took me way too long to change it and get proper help. I was so depressed and really bad when I finally got my shit together over 2 years later. I begged for help and told my girlfriend to please not let me slide out of this.

Let me be your push to try again, because everyone deserves help and to be taken seriously. You NEED to go again and insist. Don't budge. Be the "worst side of yourself" and by that I mean don't try to hide anything. There's no reason to try and appear strong and "well functioning" towards your doctor like you are probably used to doing for everyone else. Tell your doctor about every small little detail of your life that is inhibing you, and tell about all the stupid small stuff you do that you probably barely even notice yourself, like constant fidgeting or thought processes flying crazy for no reason or whatever it might be in your case.

Let the hyperfocus consume you towards getting help😄 and I mean that in the best way possible.

I've been there myself and in hindsight I wish someone would have pushed me harder to go get help and insisted I should not give up..

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

There's no reason to try and appear strong and "well functioning" towards your doctor like you are probably used to doing for everyone else.

Just wanted to add onto this something I only recently found out about myself, and I can't imagine I'm alone in this. There really isn't a "mask off" version of "me," because I started so early and it's been so long (I'm in my 40s). I basically grew around the mask. When the mask is gone, it's shattered. What's left of "me" at that point is just a quivering pile of trauma, repression, guilt/shame, and maladaptive coping skills. There's no in-between, just high- and non-functioning.

Yes, I am in therapy working on it. Double yes, it makes it difficult for anyone to believe that there's anything amiss until I break. Tis no fun.

[–] TDCN@feddit.dk 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

It's good to hear you get help. This story just speaks volumes to how important it is to get help as early as possible and to learn to drop the mask and let go when you need to. Wish you the best.