Selfhosted
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I’m not saying you’re wrong — I’ve even upvoted your earlier comments because I’m generally in agreement; you’re an instance admin judging by your handle, go and check the vote history yourself lol.
I’m saying people shouldn’t force their janky unproven solo solution on to someone else who doesn’t have their level of distrust, and would just rather trust the multibillion multinational corporation, when all they want is something that’s been working fine for them for all they care.
Well... No offense... but duh? It's not like OP can migrate his spouses "Spouse@gmail.com" address to his mail server.
I was under the assumption (and I could be wrong) that OP owns the domain... And wants to run their mailboxes. If she wants to keep her own mailbox and use it, just forward it to her gmail if that's what she wants. I'm also not insinuating forcing someone into something.
I own my domain(you guessed correctly) and host my own emails. My spouse does use an inbox on my server(actually a few)... If she didn't want to anymore she can open a mailbox where-ever she wants... and I'll even forward whatever I get to her. That's it. Wouldn't stop me from running my own inbox on my own server. And I'm not forcing her to do anything at all. She can use it or not.
This is the mentality I have when I made the previous comments. Just forward her stuff off, she can go wherever she wants.