this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
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I don't know how much, if any of this, is due to mental illness.
I've been on depression medication for 7-8yrs and my grandma and uncles will outright dismiss any negative feelings I express at any given time, with a hand wave while saying word-for-word, "just don't be sad," or, "there's other people out there worse off."
Boy, I sure wish it was as simple as just not being that way. I don't like being depressed all the time, and I would gladly just stop if that were possible, but other people's suffering does not invalidate my own, in fact it directly contributes to my depression, as I believe that most of the suffering in the world could be minimized if more people weren't so awful.
Not to mention the things they directly do that cause my depression. I'm the only one in my immediate family that is more of an "indoor person" than I am an "outdoor person." My entire life, when they would check on me in my room, drawing, reading, or especially playing video games, the first question they'd ask is, "wouldn't you rather be outside playing?" No, if I would rather be doing that, I would be doing that.
All of that was even before I grew up and realized that they're effectively brainwashed political cult worshippers, but that's a separate, off-topic issue.
Actually, bro. It's just in your head. Just don't think like that. And distract yourself.
No fella. I try distracting myself, but those thoughts are constantly fucking my petite virgin arsehole. So no. I can't just distract myself.