this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2024
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Why do people keep asking where I'm from? (lemmy.ca)
submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by Shampoo_Bottle@lemmy.ca to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
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Up until I started working, I didn't really encounter that question. When I did start working, people started asking me that question.

Them: Where are you from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Where are your grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Ok, where are your great grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

It's irritating sometimes. I just want to exist, do my job and go home, like anyone else. Once is ok, twice is odd, three times is weird, and the fourth time is a pattern.

The only accent that I might have would probably be from Newfoundland, Canada, as I grew up with a lot of people from there. I also talk too fast sometimes.

Have you had similar experiences, and if so, how did you handle it? Can fast speech patterns cause this? Why do random people care so much?

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[–] Zealous@lemmy.world 30 points 10 months ago (2 children)

As a mixed third generation immigrant, I get this a lot. In my experience, most people want to know my ethnicity, but for some reason they never ask me that directly.

[–] GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip 12 points 10 months ago

Yeah but that’s a somewhat sensitive topic. Asking for the region of origin might mean the same thing in practice, but asking someone what "breed" they are is very inappropriate.

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one 6 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Because it's none of their business and it's a tad racist, and they know racism is bad but they don't want to look as bad people.

[–] Drusas@kbin.social 9 points 10 months ago (2 children)

It's not racist to be interested in where somebody is from.

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one 7 points 10 months ago

It is if you assume that someone is from somewhere else because they don't look like you.

[–] JimmyBigSausage@lemm.ee 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

No, but it can be outright rude.

[–] Drusas@kbin.social -1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Can be, absolutely. But there is nothing inherently wrong with it. One just needs to know some tact.

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one 0 points 10 months ago

One just needs to know some tact.

"Just"? Tact is very infrequent in certain locations. I'd even say that common decency is.

[–] eezeebee@lemmy.ca 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It's not racist to ask about ethnicity.

It would be racist to ask about ethnicity and then discriminate based on the response.

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one -3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

We can easily assume the reason.

Specially if the person asking is from a certain countries where such a question is almost invariably racist.

[–] phillaholic@lemm.ee 1 points 10 months ago

You really can’t. If I ask one of my Indian co-workers what part of India they are from, I’m not trying to figure out where they land in the caste system. Indian-Americans know this, and because of them now I know why someone would avoid volunteering that information. There’s no one size fits all reaction here. Maybe they are super well informed racists that know specific regional race/classism, but I think more often than not, westerners are asking it just like they’d ask favorite sports, foods, leisure activities and so on.