this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2024
356 points (99.2% liked)

The Onion

4548 readers
1032 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
seahorse@midwest.social
pbrisgreat@midwest.social
356
Russian autopsy shows Navalny locked self in Siberian gulag, poisoned self (www.thebeaverton.com)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by ZeroCool@slrpnk.net to c/theonion@midwest.social
24 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

"MOSCOW – Officials from the Kremlin, under the close supervision of Russian President Vladimir Putin, have concluded an autopsy of Alexei Navalny, concluding that the recently-deceased opposition leader spontaneously sentenced himself to 30 years in a remote Siberian gulag before then ingesting his own poison that he brought from home."

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I follow news. You can google these facts. I don't have all the links at hand since it happened last friday.

  1. A courtage of cops driving over the bridge with unmarked vehicle and a van inbetween that was posted by Mediazona and then repeated in propagandist's video. No one knew that his dead body was moved at that time.
  2. It happened exactly one month before a future election.
  3. Many officers of ФСИН were rewarded in a short period of time between his death and now.
  4. People who tried to commemorate his death with flowers were imprisoned and charged, an order to observe monuments to political prisoners was leaked.
  5. He was secretly driven to a remote location, quickly died there and then the reveal of a corpse was put to a later time to disperse any reaction, and he was once again moved.

That's not regular procedures.

There's no obvious benefits to that, as he had no power, so it's probably completely symbolical. Demonizing him and his peers even more can be a boost for elections though. And the way the state services act mysteriously there doesn't show they want one truth, but a polarizing event that'd harm opposition and approve the position held by his support base.

[–] Thief_of_Crows@sh.itjust.works 0 points 9 months ago

Thanks for the breakdown, I follow news, but there sure is a lot of it lately. And especially with American takes on Russia, it is effectively impossible to find reliable news sources beyond literally Reddit, and now even reddit isn't reliable. I don't even trust American News about American news, certainly not Russian.

On #3, that isnt a regular occurrence, right? I mean, I can imagine Biden getting assassinated, and then a month later Congress gets their quarterly bribes. It definitely looks suspicious, but it's actually business as usual.

In #s 1 and 5, that's all post mortem, right? Are the circumstances of the actual death equally suspicious? Cause like, the CIA and FBI worked very hard to cover up their long association with Lee Harvey Oswald, but that doesn't necessarily mean they told him to do it. Do you think it's possible a similar situation could have occured here?