this post was submitted on 11 Nov 2024
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[–] Eyck_of_denesle@lemmy.zip 32 points 1 week ago (7 children)

Etiquette one I don't agree. It's just being respectful and mindful. You will acknowledge it once you see the absolute lack of it.

[–] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 59 points 1 week ago

One of the things my parents did understand correctly as "new money" is that a significant portion of piddling etiquette rules about what color to wear at what times of the year and which fork goes on the left were largely ways for the bourgeoisie to attempt to maintain their advanced standing against the increases in (the potential for) equality that capitalism initially brought about. Unfortunately my parents are also a very "well we got ours so everyone else must be lazy" type of people who think that's as good as equality can or should get.

[–] apotheotic@beehaw.org 35 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Except etiquette extends beyond just "common social etiquette". Using a knife and fork the "correct way" is etiquette. Eating soup by scooping the spoon away from oneself is etiquette. Placing your cutlery the correct way on the dish when you're finished is etiquette and varies wildly by country. These are just examples of dining etiquette, there's much more. Its all bullshit and I agree it should boil down to being respectful and mindful, but depending who raised you it may happen that you get reprimanded and punished for not following very arbitrary rules.

[–] Lodespawn@aussie.zone 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Wait, theres a wrong way to scoop soup?! It seems I've been screwing up soup for a long time..

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 10 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Yah, you scoop away. No slurping. No passing out in the bowl.

[–] vithigar@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 week ago

You can scoop however you want, but if you slurp I'm absolutely asking you to stop.

[–] Lodespawn@aussie.zone 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Pfft, I'm not not passing out in my soup

[–] isVeryLoud@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 week ago

I have the most wonderful naps face down in soup

[–] Eyck_of_denesle@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 week ago

Agree. English isn't my first language and I did not know it also meant dining etiquette.

[–] 7bicycles@hexbear.net 26 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I don't think this means "Etiquette (please and thank you)", I think this means "Etiquette (look at this rube using his crab fork to grab pasta, what a yokel)"

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Even cursive writing was not designed to be faster like my teacher said, it was to weed out the yokels from the gentlemen. A Thomas Jefferson-style hand, full of curlicues and serifs and f/s-es (i.e."difcufsion" for discussion) could be read or written by a person whose wealth enabled their education, but not by someone whose literacy was achieved by reading the family Bible and local newspaper.

[–] AbsoluteChicagoDog@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago

Damn I never knew that

[–] Eyck_of_denesle@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 week ago

Makes more sense. I just use my hands.

[–] LANIK2000@lemmy.world 20 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Considering every culture has completely different etiquette, I'd argue otherwise. We're talking drinking from bowls vs talking during a meal style stuff. I'll hold my fork with the right hand and knife in left, despite being right handed and no etiquette freak can stop me!

[–] threeganzi@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 week ago

Yeah, if anyone is bothered by which hand I hold my fork in, I’d say they should see a therapist and work it out on their end.

[–] LwL@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

Really depends on what part of it. There are things like offering your bus seat to someone who needs it, or waiting for people to exit before you enter. Those indeed make sense.

And then there's what the other commenters pointed out, arbitrary rules about what cutlery to use and in which hand and such.

[–] Lussy@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

Yeah makes you wonder the real meaning behind what they’re saying.

[–] Draedron@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Why the fuck does it matter how I hold my forkor what spoon I eat soup with? Why does it matter where my ellbows are?

[–] Eyck_of_denesle@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 week ago

Idk why everyone is talking about dining etiquette.