this post was submitted on 18 Jun 2024
898 points (96.2% liked)

The Onion

4542 readers
966 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
seahorse@midwest.social
pbrisgreat@midwest.social
898
Man who calls women "females" hopes to one day be allowed within 500 meters of one (chaser.com.au)
submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by Nero@sopuli.xyz to c/theonion@midwest.social
237 comments fedilink hide all child comments
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 16 points 5 months ago (4 children)

I love the scent of a female.

[–] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 18 points 5 months ago (1 children)

As a humanoid male, i too love the scent of a homo sapien female.

[–] RageAgainstTheRich@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago (2 children)

As a sentient homo sapien, I find myself inexorably drawn to the olfactory stimuli emitted by the female of our species, which invoke an unparalleled sensory euphoria within the neural pathways of my encephalon. 🧐

[–] samus12345@lemmy.world 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Give yourself some credit! You were able to write that sentence and post it on the internet, so you're sapient, not merely sentient!

[–] Sidyctism2@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 5 months ago

And with one hand, too!

[–] sunzu@kbin.run 0 points 5 months ago

You dropped your fedora, redditor!

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 9 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

I find there's nothing better than harvesting the scent of a female in a tank, with flower petals of course, and then scrapings it off thier skin. Someday I hope to use it in all five chords of a fragrance.

[–] state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 5 months ago

Perfume, story of a murderer

[–] AVengefulAxolotl@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Bro wat

What... why... when did you come up with that username. I regret interpreting it

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I love the scent of a female.